Waaaay the hell outta left field

I figure that after a 2 month sabbatical from writing I better kick my tits off the ground and get back on the horse.  Where have I been?

Well there could be amazing stories about insanity of mother-hood; living my life on a day-to-day basis; but they would likely be illusions of grander for you all... truthfully my life as of late has been pretty repetitious.  I haven't done much of anything really...but it's been pretty great!

I have managed to get myself into some shit though...yes, your favorite non-blogging blogger has been up to some shit!!!  So as I do enjoy a great story telling I wanted to make it into a game for all of us.  Let's do a multiple choicey thing-a-majig.

Last Sunday...I
a) went to church
b) had my sister and fiancee over for brunch
c) had my sister and fiancee over for brunch, got tipsy on mimosas and then went out for dinner with the hubby and friends
d) went out for dinner with the kids

By occupation, I am a dining specialist.  I make reservations at the worlds top restaurants, and "should" be good at this...If I had gone out for dinner with friends, what time would the reservation have been made at?
a) 6:30 pm
b) 7:00 pm
c) 8:00 pm
d) 5:30 pm

If all statements thus far are true, and I were good at my job....what time would it be unforgivably rude if we showed up to a reservation?
a) 7:00 pm
b) 8:00 pm
c) 9:00 pm
d) no showed

If we were late for any reservation what would have been the likely reason?
a) lost a child at the grocery store
b) went to friends house, had a cocktail or four
c) went to friends house, called the restaurant to push the reservation to a later time, had a cocktail and went to the restaurant.  On the way perhaps the driver was speeding to pass two transport trucks and happened to have gotten pulled over.  If this had happened, and the driver didn't have his license with him; the police officer may have thought that the car was stolen as we couldn't find the ownership and insurance (oh, and by the way, the car we were driving may or may not have been his mother's) oh and then the police officer thought the car was stolen.
d) I had to go pee while driving to the restaurant and we stopped at the side of the hi way, where I was blown over by the gust of wind

If any of these statements were true, would there have been additional circumstances that this story was even remotely possible?
a) yes
b) no

If there were other reasons was it because I
a) ate hash brownies
b) smoked a fatty
c) was wasted off of one drink and smoked something funny
d) all of the above

If there were some altering substances and perhaps I was a tad intoxicated, did we even make it to the restaurant?
a) yes
b) no

Ok, so yes, many layers of amazingness in my life.  Mr. Insatiable felt horrible for not having his license with him, and our friends that were with us, have actually talked to us since it all happened but you know, we did come out on top after all of that.  He only received a ticket for failure to produce the insurance and ownership...  it definitely could have been worse.

Did you pass the quiz?

Tell me though, what have you been up to??


Vanessa said...

Welcome back :)

Kristy said...

I haven't been up to anything as exciting as that! We were sick around here for about the month of February. Glad to see you're back though!